FW: Fw: Growing Up in Missouri

This is pretty funny - but true!!


>From:
>To:
>Subject: Fw: Growing Up in Missouri
>Date: Thu, 19 Jan 2006 08:16:00 -0600
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> Subject
> Fw: Growing Up in Missouri
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>1. You've never met any celebrities.
>2. Everyone you know has been on a "Float Trip,"
>3. "Vacation" means driving to Silver Dollar City, Worlds of Fun or Six
>Flags.
>4. You've seen all the biggest bands ten years AFTER they were popular.
>5. You measure distance in minutes rather than miles. For example, "Well,
>Webb City's only 20 minutes away."
>6. Down south to you means Arkansas.
>7. The phrase "I'm going to the Lake this weekend" only means one thing.
>8. You know several people who have hit a deer.
>9. You think Missouri is spelled with an "ah" at the end.
>10. Your school classes were canceled because of cold.
>11. You know what "Party Cove" is.
>12. Your school classes were canceled because of heat.
>13. You instinctively ask someone you've just met, "What High School did
>you go to?"
>14. You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
>15. You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."
>16. You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July.
>17. You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.
>18. You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in
>it, no matter what time of day.
>19. You know in your heart that Mizzou can beat Nebraska in football.
>20. You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example:
>"Where's my coat at?"
>21. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable
>or grain.[What is the Testicle Festival? fruit,grain or veg.
> There actually is a festival by that name and it's down around
>Jefferson City.
>22. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both
>unlocked.
>23. You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O
>salad with marshmallows.
>24. You carry jumper cables in your car and know that everyone else should.
>
>25. You went to skating parties as a kid.
>26. You only own three spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.
>27. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
>28. You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.
>29. The local paper covers national and international headlines on one
> page, but requires six pages for sports.
>30. You think I-44 is spelled and pronounced "farty-far." (St. Louis only.)
>
>31. You'll pay for your kids to go to college unless they want to go to KU.
>
>32. You think that "deer season" is a National Holiday.
>33. You know that Concordia is halfway between Kansas City and Columbia,
> and Columbia is halfway between St. Louis and Kansas City, and the
> Warrenton Outlet Mall is halfway between Columbia and St. Louis.
>34. You can't think of anything better than sitting on the porch in the
> middle of the summer during a thunderstorm.
>35. You know which leaves make good toilet paper.[more important - which
>ones don't]
>36. You've said, "it's not the heat, it's the humidity."
>37. You know all four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer and
>Football.
>38. You know if another Missourian is from the Boot-heel, Ozarks, Eastern,
>Middle or
> Western Missouri soon as they open their mouth.
>39. You know that Harry S Truman, Walt Disney and Mark Twain are all from
>Missouri.
> [Did they forget to add Dennis Weaver and Brad Pitt?]
>40. You failed World Geography in school because you thought Cuba,
>Versailles, California,
> Nevada, Houston, Cabool, Louisiana, Springfield, and Mexico were
>cities in Missouri.
> (And they are!)
>41. You think a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.
>42. You know what "HOME OF THE THROWED ROLL" means.
>43. You actually get this and forward it to all your Missouri friends.
>